A Simple Reminder to Be Kind to Yourself


Kindness is something that comes quite natural to me. I give warmth & friendliness to all that is around me, offering smiles for the weary & a listening ear to those who are feeling overwhelmed. Being loving & giving my whole self to others is part of my disposition. I feel the most joy when I know I am making others happy.

But in my efforts to be a little ray of sunshine to others, I somehow always forget to be kind to my own self, as though the well being of perfect strangers is more important than the inner contentment of myself.

I’ve been especially hard on myself for the last few days. I feel like I am not writing enough, not being productive enough. I reprimand myself for making simple mistakes, like fudging a dinner recipe or saying the wrong thing in a conversation. In these moments, I am terribly unkind to myself, which in turn riles me up, depletes my creativity, & transforms my friendly demeanor into pitiful self loathing.

Last night I found myself feeling particularly overwhelmed with thoughts of disappointment & annoyance with all of things I didn’t do that day. As my mind muddled itself with terrible, incessant thoughts — Shame on you! You are no good! You are a failure! You don’t deserve happiness or relaxation today! — I felt my hand clench into a fist. I decided I had heard enough.

So I took a very deep breath, let it out slowly, & whispered firmly, Stop.

And just like that, the negative thoughts dwindled into nothingness & my mind settled down to a halt.

Sometimes I forget that I don’t have to listen to the hurtful nonsense that goes on inside of my head, & that I can give myself permission to put an end to it. The moment I remind myself of my power is the moment those wretched thoughts become weak & meaningless. It is then that I can let the kindness seep in & penetrate my mind with unadulterated love & friendliness.

That is the way life should be lived: with your head buzzing with kindness for yourself.

Today, I want to remind you to be perpetually kind to yourself. Be loving, be friendly. Devote an entire page in your diary to how wonderful you are; brag on your talents & beauty. Give yourself leeway to make mistakes & do not dwell on them. Remind yourself of your power over your thoughts & take advantage of that. You do not (& should not) have to listen to the endless cycle of insults that goes on inside of your head. Tune them out or simply tell them to shut up. Go on with your day in a blissful state of self-consciousness & self kindness.

Treat yourself the way you want to be treated.

© 2018 Ev'Yan Whitney. All rights reserved.